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My story of growing up I was born in a Salvation army home where my mother was sent and I was made a ward of the state as soon as I was born. I was not meant to survive birth as I had a strangulation hernia, I was operated on and survived ( usually most died)I was baptized at 3weeks with some others at an anglican church. I was put in a home for orphans when I was 12 months and lived there till I was 5 years of age. We were well cared for and were right on the beach front.I can remember the old house very vividly and how we slept as four to a bed we had our own Nanny who looked after us .I cannot remember her but know her name was Aunt Bea. Christmas was a good time as we received gifts but alas by lunch time many toys were broken. When I was five years of age I was adopted to a couple who could not have . I was fortunate as I had a room of my own and my own bed was a real shock having so much when I had been use to so little. I had to have special treatment to my feet as my toes curled under through wearing shoes that were too small.I hated the exercises as they hurt my toes so much.I loved my new home and the parents that took me in until I was seven years of age, then things changed for me dramatically instead of the happy go lucky girl I should have been I became miserable and very with drawn at times this was due to be sexuality assaulted by my adopted father . I had no-one I could turn to was our secret. I never ever told my mother as she loved her husband so deeply. So I carried this burden until she died four years ago. I had a break down as could not cope as I had to look after my adopted father when he became ill till he died in the late 80's. I had mother to look after and also my husband who had early dementia so you see my life has not been a real happy one but my turn will come . I do not want sympathy. Why am I telling you all this because I know it is so hard to be a who has been sexually assaulted and we can never forget but can forgive.Yes there are probably some of you too have been through this and I am sorry. You know once you write about it and get it out the load seems so much lighter . Thank you for reading this Tassie |
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3/5/2007 3:41 am |
Tassie, I LOVE YOU SIS. Hugsssssssss Betty From AZ With Love! 
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3/5/2007 9:26 am |
I was once told a load shared is cut in half.....So if anyone should per chance share here chances are very good that things will be much, much lighter.  Thanks for sharing.
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Tassie, I was born in a Salvation Army Hospital too and given up for adoption age 15 months. While I didn't suffer any sexual abuse, I did suffer psychological abuse and have come to the conclusion adoption isn't always as great as many people today imagine. You, at least, have forgiven, I have not. I can't help but admire your way of coping.
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3/5/2007 11:59 pm |
Tassie- My arms around you in a common sisterhood..... There is a large community of survivors out here; not all are able to share....but I do beleive that it is important to speak out about abuse of all kinds.........if it saves ONE child.......it is imperative that these cycles be broken. As an adult, in talking to others about what I went through, many of them KNEW what was going on but stayed silent! And the first thing I always thought "Why didnt you say anything to save us?" I would implore everyone who reads this blog from your heart, to ACT if you suspect a child is being abused... there are ways to find out and put an end to it without putting yourself at risk. ......I turned myself into a crusader for abused children as soon as I healed enough to be able to do so........ Carry on Tassie, and know that we support you, and are here for you, I know that this was difficult you to put out here.......I applaud you!!! [[[[]]]]]]]
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3/6/2007 3:47 pm |
Tassie my dear friend, thoughts with you as always!! You are right about one thing...you never forget...but I'm afraid, unlike you...I could never forgive. No one has the right to sexually abuse any human being, child or otherwise. When its a parent or relative, its ten times worse!! Tassie, look to the future, I know you still have a lot to endure, but knowing you, it is another hurdle you will overcome. There is a light at the end of the tunnel!!! Take care my friend "riff"
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