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An open letter to SFF Okay here goes.LOBBY..Am tired of seeing chatters come into the lobby and they are from foreign countries hitting on EVERY lady in the room. Gets to be a bore when this happens and disrupts the room, as the ladies leave.Then there is the TEST person who drops into the room,..test and leaves..why can we as chatters have this person available to call up and ask him/her to check these people who for no reason cause havoc in the Lobby.Then there are the spies, yes, who report every detail to SFF., never do they report the good people who help to control the room but people like yaya, who to me was a great chatter. For some reason, which has not been explained to us, regular chatters, she has been banned for life. Get real here people, this is a chatroom not a classroom. We are adu;ts in here an seems that the spies feel they have the right to condemn a chatter. Why if they have a problem with yaya cant just use the ignore. Of which is in use most of the time. Well as in the classroom it feels that we will bee banned if we speak outta turn. Agree this room (lobby) belongs to SFF and do appreciate the use of it daily. This was a great place to meet people, help and even give hugs in time of need. So after this long letter, will or can you reinstate a lady (yaya) that everyone, well except for the spies, delights in. Seems there was a petition, that originated at the Florida meet, was to be forwarded to you, but is sitting on a chatters desk. I would like to see some action from SFF on this subject. Doug,beeaird,boirdman, telling it like it is. |
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2/25/2007 6:19 pm |
First Boirdman, SFF is an international chatroom. THERE ARE No Foreigners. Why don't you flippin Americans grow to hell up.
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2/25/2007 7:01 pm |
Rick seeing is that we are making comments on comments let me say that all this belly aching and whining is getting tiresome. You can't even use the word \bsexo?\b on SFF because of a bunch of right wing religious nut cases. There's an iggy button, use it on the bores and quit whining. There are several Canadians doing the same thing by the way. They sit in these chatrooms and wait for an excuse to complain. My response to them is grow up and get a flippin life.
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First Boirdman, SFF is an international chatroom. THERE ARE No Foreigners. Why don't you flippin Americans grow to hell up. Some believe in destiny, some believe in fate. I believe that happiness is something we create 
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2/25/2007 7:12 pm |
If I remember correctly boirdman is a Canadian. Debbie
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2/25/2007 7:54 pm |
ok...boirdman...i agree with you..the english language is what we speak and should be the only one spoken..in chat..where everyone listens and talks...i find myself very..confused if other languages are spoken cause ..i am stupid yankee and dont understand... as for you tagalderi...i am a flipping american..and i dont appreciate...the tone of your comment but..i will fight for your right to say it...i just dont happen to like the way you said it..so tell me..tag..should i put you in iggy box...because of the phrase flipping americans should grow..the hell up..??? just wondering..
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2/25/2007 11:00 pm |
I'm with Knotagamer. Good thing we're not in a real room otherwise there'd be spit flying all over the place. LOL I live in Hawaii, where there are an estimated 54 (that's right) FIFTY FOUR spoken languages/dialects. I love it all because people are the same wherever you go....they want respect, friendliness, a kind ear, despite whatever language they're speaking. Ever been in non-English speaking country and finally hear someone speak English (as in a restaurant)? The response is to go speak to that person in English. Same thing with "their" languages in "our" chatrooms. It's not to be offensive. "foreigners"?? That reminds me of the lady I met at the post office who was asking about the international shipping rates. She was a visitor on vacation who was mailing a package at her home in CALIFORNIA. It's 2007, and with all that's happening in the world, we still use the word "foreigners"! Hah!
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There is only one way to stop all of this...each of us taking responsibility for our own actions...and treating others as we would wish to be treated. Any chatroom is only as good as it's users make it. "Do as you would be done by" is the golden rule for chatrooms, all it takes is use of good plain manners, some common sense and respect...and being aware of our own behaviours and prejudices. If you dont like someone, or their behaviour and can't manage to put up with them for the time you're in the room...use the ignore button. if you dont like people speaking a different language...use the ignore button, why should it bother you when you can switch it off? As far as abuse in chat goes...why sit there allowing someone to abuse you...then complain about it? Why would anyone do that when they can turn the person off? The point I am making is that (in chat especially) you can ONLY be abused if you allow it...so if you do that...why moan later? We are all adults, we make our own choices, nobody can make us do something without our consent.
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2/26/2007 3:20 am |
Amazing how a blog about Yaya gets used for more gripes and whining, isn't it. In all the years I have chatted to her in the chatrooms I have personally never read anything she said that would be within cooee of being objectionable, judgmental or righteous. On the other hand I have read plenty that falls into those categories by others and, I dare say, there may have been the odd time where for one reason or another I might have been guilty of being judgmental or righteous. And if someone had wanted to put me straight on that, well, I'm adult and honest enough to take the criticism to pull me into line, if so warranted. I have said it before in another blog and I'll say it again. Those people who don't go to chatrooms because they have read some adverse comments about what goes in there, you obviously have no real idea what goes in there. As Yankee says, there's a lot of cameraderie and fun, outweighing the negative aspects by 100 to one. Not every blogger and not every commenter needs to be taken that seriously to the point you can't come in and make up your own mind. There will always be someone who doesn't like someone else for one reason or another ... but remember there are hundreds of happy chatters, myself included, who know how to use an iggy button, how to defuse a potential chat argument or, with a few simple but well chosen words, get the room chat back on track again to where it should be. But ... it's your choice to come into the chatroom or not but please don't make comments about it if you don't really know what you're talking about. And if someone wants to call me a flippin' Aussie, what the heck do I care? Sticks and stones ... and all that.
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2/26/2007 4:40 am |
sure sounds like a bar/club to me , of course women get hit on in bars/clubs , of course there are married people hanging out in bars/clubs hoping to get lucky , SFF is DATING FOR THOSE WITH EXPERIENCE .no matter how much people want to think it's like a church social , it isn't , it's more like a bar/club ..
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2/26/2007 5:14 am |
SFF is posted on a system that is called the world wide web and since that is the case, it is available to the world. as long as there are men and women in the same vicinity there will always be "hitting on" occurring whether it is intiated by male or female foreign or national. that is the way it is. i really do not care if someone speaks another language or not because it does not happen all that much in reality. it is no different than sending private messages while in flash chat except that you may become annoyed since you do not know what someone else might be saying and why do you care what they are saying anyway. so what, it is communication between two other people and not addressed to you or about you. however, i do support the notion if you do not have the ability to converse in english then it might be a better idea to find a site in the tongue that you have. as for spies, i do not know if that is true or not but i do know that there are individuals that have taken it upon themselves to be the "morality standard" or the "controller" or the "avenger". i find those individuals to be reprehensible.
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2/26/2007 6:55 am |
I've seen more than that. I remember a chat session once attended by quite a few Philipinas and the Tagalog language flowed freely. Normally that doesn't bother me, except for the fact that I was in IM with someone at the same time who had a basic grasp of the language. As it turned out the chat in that language was about making fun, and not nice fun either, of someone else in the chatroom behind his back. Now, that was utterly disrespectful to him and disgraceful, imo.And as long as that sort of thing can and does occur I am against any conversation, other than a good morning or goodbye, in a language other than English, on principle.
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2/26/2007 8:26 am |
Rick seeing is that we are making comments on comments let me say that all this belly aching and whining is getting tiresome. You can't even use the word \bsexo?\b on SFF because of a bunch of right wing religious nut cases. There's an iggy button, use it on the bores and quit whining. There are several Canadians doing the same thing by the way. They sit in these chatrooms and wait for an excuse to complain. My response to them is grow up and get a flippin life. This blog was really meant to say, SFF banned a person for a lifetime and yet we see others that come and go. Yes, yaya has been in there off and on, and when this happens so does the person that checks her every word.
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Doug, Yaya was banned for trying to be nice to someone who took that as being harrassment. If she had just iggied the first time, the problem would not have existed. Time she was allowed back, for sure.
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2/26/2007 8:45 am |
We all teach our children how to behave properly. Although we rarely see it ourselves. On-line manners are no different. There are rules for proper behavior in cyberspace called "Netiquette." And it's a good thing we have them, because people do outrageous things when they get behind a keyboard-things they would ordinarily never do in real life face to face. Don't be critical of others, especially newbies, even if they break the rules. If you need to help or correct someone, do it by e-mail, not in a public forum like a chatroom or newsgroup. Remember, everyone was a newbie once. These things are bad Netiquette, too: . Using ALL CAPITAL LETTERS-it's considered shouting and is hard on the eyes. . Flaming-inciting or provoking an argument. . Posting false or rude information about someone else. . Sending a large attachment without asking if it's okay first. . Referring to someone by their real name in a chatroom or channel. . Talking about something off-topic in a special topic chatroom. . Not waiting your turn or following the chatroom or channel rules in a special on-line event. These are all no-nos. Remember that just because you're hiding out behind a computer monitor, you aren't exempt from correct and thoughtful communications. Basically, the way we behave ourselves in our friends' real homes, is how to behave in a private turf. Friendly, respectful, positive, supportive interaction. Interaction should be consent-based. Don't couple with, thrust at, stack on, or cuddle anyone without their permission. Initiating contact with an avie just to see if they give in or move away is not proper prior consent. Problems? Anyone being subject to maltreatment should set the acting party on Ignore and/or ESP the acting party to ask them to refrain. If there continues to be a problem, ESP the host for assistance. Do not place complaints on behalf of other persons. No illegal statements or behavior. No threats. No pretending to be a persona that belongs to someone else. That's all! Tagalderi, in a sense you just committed a hate crime against americans by naming calling (FLIPPIN) and you should be reported. This is wrong and you owe everyone here an apology for the words you used. You have so much anger in some of your blogs its sad. If you don't like us AMERICAN's then get out of our group. Go somewhere they will appreciate your sick candor.
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2/26/2007 9:29 am |
We all teach our children how to behave properly. Although we rarely see it ourselves. On-line manners are no different. There are rules for proper behavior in cyberspace called "Netiquette." And it's a good thing we have them, because people do outrageous things when they get behind a keyboard-things they would ordinarily never do in real life face to face. Don't be critical of others, especially newbies, even if they break the rules. If you need to help or correct someone, do it by e-mail, not in a public forum like a chatroom or newsgroup. Remember, everyone was a newbie once. These things are bad Netiquette, too: . Using ALL CAPITAL LETTERS-it's considered shouting and is hard on the eyes. . Flaming-inciting or provoking an argument. . Posting false or rude information about someone else. . Sending a large attachment without asking if it's okay first. . Referring to someone by their real name in a chatroom or channel. . Talking about something off-topic in a special topic chatroom. . Not waiting your turn or following the chatroom or channel rules in a special on-line event. These are all no-nos. Remember that just because you're hiding out behind a computer monitor, you aren't exempt from correct and thoughtful communications. Basically, the way we behave ourselves in our friends' real homes, is how to behave in a private turf. Friendly, respectful, positive, supportive interaction. Interaction should be consent-based. Don't couple with, thrust at, stack on, or cuddle anyone without their permission. Initiating contact with an avie just to see if they give in or move away is not proper prior consent. Problems? Anyone being subject to maltreatment should set the acting party on Ignore and/or ESP the acting party to ask them to refrain. If there continues to be a problem, ESP the host for assistance. Do not place complaints on behalf of other persons. No illegal statements or behavior. No threats. No pretending to be a persona that belongs to someone else. That's all! Tagalderi, in a sense you just committed a hate crime against americans by naming calling (FLIPPIN) and you should be reported. This is wrong and you owe everyone here an apology for the words you used. You have so much anger in some of your blogs its sad. If you don't like us AMERICAN's then get out of our group. Go somewhere they will appreciate your sick candor.
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2/26/2007 9:33 am |
OK..so boird poorly phrased what I take to be as the young off shore hustlers. Male and female alike. They are an annoyance to be sure. Percentage wise there are as many 'flippin' any nationality as any other. Why tag would only mention Americans I don't know. Charmed: You should learn the difference between a minor insult and a hate crime. Miles apart. Dandee: Right on. These self appointed thugs make life miserable for all. Got their head up thier butts with self righteousnous. Dups. YaYa should be allowed back. Her adversary DID NOT stay out of chat for the appointed time. That is BS. Wake up and smell the coffee. She came in under other names. Any one who doesn't believe that, call me. I've got a bridge I'd like to sell you. Same for anyone who believes YaYa got a fair shake and the only complaints against her were valid and honest, without exaggeration. More BS. The pity is that sff swallowed the sales pitch, hook, line and sinker. Shame! ET..well said. The bitter, the vindictive, the morality police and others make chat a major waste of time most days. Pity they think they are the only right viewpoint and try to control a room, or whine like stuck pigs when confronted. Their halos have slipped and their noses are brown. It will be a happy day when they don't come back. They only have courage in a pack. Mob mentality of the ethically bankrupt and intellecutally challenged. Insecurity manifested.
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2/26/2007 11:43 am |
With thanxx..a reply from SFF. Thanks for contacting customer support, We apologize for the inconvenience. SeniorFriendFinder has issued these policies and guidelines to improve the overall user-experience as well as to comply with government laws and regulations. We regret certain rules may seem unreasonable to a particular member, however it is important for us to keep these rules enforced across the board with no exceptions made. For the reason of protecting the member's privacy and security, we are unable to tell the status of other member's account. Can you tell "yaya" to contact with us with her issue? Once we get her email, we will take care of her issue as soon as possible. Please feel free to contact us for any questions or comments. Eddie H. Senior Friend Finder Team Support
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2/26/2007 11:55 am |
Let's just call in Judge Judy to settle this, there is just to much angry and fighting going on, we are not kids, I think its time we acted like adults. Shuterbugdoug, thanks for the correction. I agree with some of your response also. missassypants, I sometimes wonder about some, if they will ever get along, as for the rules maybe those do gooders who think they are so much better than the others will follow them. But, there should be peace here some how. You are right tomorrow might not come.
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2/26/2007 12:24 pm |
Dups. It's called collateral damage. Stand around in a war zone and you take your chances. When I take broadsides at anyone, I stand alone. I don't need a mob to back me up. It would be nice to know just who you include in the Bully Brigade. I have a list of my own that I bet is vastly different from yours. My opinion of stampin and her gallery of yapping hyenas is no secret. You never saw the name ironhorse? It's the adversarys hubby. She came in under that handle and others. Why don't you ask her? She knows her other handles better than anyone. I don't care who you admit to knowing or not. Nor do I care whether you do know them or not, although I have my own opinions on that. You stood fair square in their corner. Learn to duck or take the heat, as I mentioned in sff email in response to your question. Why do you single out yaya as needing to have a positive attitude? She has more right than most to defend herself against a concerted and malicious attacker. What about her adversary, who lies in wait for any and every opportunity to report her back to ssf control? The coffee is on. It's there for the smelling. PS: I suggest we start up a separate blog for this so it's not scattered all over the place. It will be under my handle. Reply there if you wish. The blog will be OPEN to ALL for this subject. Unlike others, I don't delete contrary comments in my blogs. I prefer the entire exchange be there for all to see and follow.
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2/26/2007 12:40 pm |
All I can say is WTG Shutter!!!! I will read "with interest" your blog.... Boird....it seems a big can of worms and whoop \bass\b was opened here. WTG .....it has been a long time coming...
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2/26/2007 1:53 pm |
Off to comment on dougs blog..might as well see what happens........
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2/26/2007 4:52 pm |
Smiles4: JOin me in the back seat of my Oldsmobile, and we can communicate using Braille!!!!.....
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2/26/2007 8:30 pm |
Smiles ... take it from me, Yaya is a woman. Her Christian name starts with N. I have googled SFF handles myself and many of them don't come up with anything, others come up about totally different people who happen to have an internet handle that's very close to the one you might be looking for. Dan, I basically agree with you re foreign languages but when you know, as I discovered (see my Greyfox comment here), that it was used to abuse and make fun of a fellow chatter who remained innocent of it while it happened, then it's a no-no across the board for me.
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I never saw YaYa do or say anything out of the way. The gal that had her banned has made an attempt to make as many enemies as she could, Even sending me emails bragging about having people banned. When I blocked her, I got banned myself. I have all of her handles that I know of blocked. She lives in my iggy land forever.
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2/27/2007 6:53 am |
These comments are hilarious. Unduplicated you said "We are all friends". You have to be kidding? Read these comments and you should be able to see that if they are it is a very unusual friendship.
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