Advertisement
My Blog
Blogs > Ola2006 > Notes from Ola
Notes from Ola
  
Love come softly, brush against my heart
Yearning for its closeness, not ever to depart
In God’s Infinite Wisdom, I place my life,
And trust for tomorrow, what be, what might
Whatever path this love may go
It carries with it the willingness,
to let it go
And hope that one day, it will again, brush against my heart ....
To stay forever.
Karen A. 05/30/06
Title View |
Discouraged May 12, 2006 11:24 am
616 Views
I hate days like today. Oh, the sun is out, and there is a soft breeze blowing. It's going to be a warm one though, I can tell.

Anyway, the weather just doesn't seem to be helping my mood.

I feel discouraged and disappointed. Most of it is just because maybe I place too much expectation on myself, and on others. When those expectations aren't met .... I feel discouraged.

Sometimes I think I'm still that naive little sixteen year old girl, living in this 55 year old body. Do I really see the world differently than what it is? Do I really have unrealistic expectations about what love is, and intimacy and what is respectful behavior, and what isn't.

I'll pull out of this, I always do. Tomorrow will be a brighter day.

In fact, tomorrow I am taking my Mom and my Aunt to A Southern Tea. That will be fun.

Love you all,
~Karen

16 Comments
If you could be invisible for one hour May 11, 2006 6:22 pm
536 Views
This was a question in a magazine I was reading and I thought it would be interesting to see what kind of responses came from you.

For me .... I thought and I thought.

If I could be invisible for one hour, I think I'd like to walk down a beach naked. Course, I realize there are people who do that without being invisible ... but not me, heaven forbid that they would be able to see me!

What would you do?

~Karen
6 Comments
Update on Top Ten list May 11, 2006 12:01 pm
551 Views
A fellow SFF'r told me he knew what should be on the list. I promised him I would post it as my next blog if he shared his knowledge with me. So here is an update on the Top Ten things men understand about women. Contributed by non other than the master women's auctioneer himself. You'll notice that there are only four items. That's because he hasn't quite got us figured out yet. Anyone wanting to add to the list ... be my guest.

1. Never stand between a woman and a bargain ... the bargain will get you run over.

2. When a woman says Yes, she means No; when she says No she means Maybe, and when she says Maybe ...your guess is as good as mine

3. The bottom of a woman's purse is like a Black Hole....what goes in never comes out and ends up in another Space and Reality (some say accredited to A. Einstein)

4. Women, in general, love sex (good sex), chocolate, flowers, money (and the freedom to spend it freely) and male companionship....not necessarily in that order.

This list has been reproduced with permission from tcwonder: "You may use those for your own blog, if you like, I'll forget them until the subject comes up again....my brain is like a woman's purse....those thoughts...where did they go"

~Karen
6 Comments
Top Ten Things Men Understand about Women May 10, 2006 10:40 pm
548 Views
After 33 years of marriage, my friend came up with the top 10 list. To all you men out there, you would do good to memorize them...

Top Ten Things Men Understand About Women

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.



7 Comments
These are a few of my favorite things May 10, 2006 8:05 pm
473 Views
A recent email inspired this blog Specially since most of us standard members don't get too many chances to view profiles and find out stuff. Just wanted to have some fun here.

Music: I like soft jazz; blues; good ole down home foot stompin, hand clapping, country gospel; classical guitar; classical piano; blue grass.

Favorite Ice cream desert Hot Fudge Sundae! Yum.

Favorite Author/Book: Francine Rivers, Redeeming Love This was a love story, and correlates with Christ's Redeeming love for us. It was a beautiful story.

Favorite Quote:Currently it is: "Don't let fear of what might be get in the way of what could be."

Pleasant Feeling:Sitting by a lake in the mountains, its early morning, the sun is up and shining on my face, and I close my eyes and listen to nature waking up.

Funny Memory:Once on a camping trip, my Mom and I took a walk up to the little outhouse. On our way back down the trail ... it forked off just for a short distance, we looked at each other and both took off running to race to where the trail came back together. My Mom tripped over a tree limb and went flying forward. Kathump! face down in the dirt and dust! all was quiet for a moment in time, and then she started laughing ... and then I could too!

Favorite Sound:sound of a buzz saw. It reminds me of my Dad.

Qualities I like in a man: Handsome on the inside, tenderhearted, smart (but not too smart for his britches) good sense of humor,and positive attitude. Mature in emotion and mental outlook. One who has a deep spiritual base and strong foundation in his beliefs. Knows his Creator, and the Creator's Son.

Okay ladies and gents ... its your turn. You don't have to list all the same things, but if you feel like sharing, tell me about your favorite things.

~Karen
1 comment
Just to say hello May 10, 2006 9:01 am
488 Views
Believe it or not ... I've got nothing to blog about today! Oh my, what will I do I guess I'll just read everyone else's.

I'm leaving here in a little bit to meet my Mom and "Uncle" Dad for breakfast. I call him my "Uncle" Dad because he is my Dad's younger brother. He lost his wife about two years before my Dad passed away. Mom was lucky, she got to keep the same name after 50 years!

My Uncle Dad is a very sweet man, and he is good to my Mom. They make a cute couple.

I hope the day is good to you.

Love,
~Karen
4 Comments
Memories ~ life changes May 9, 2006 1:42 pm
492 Views
I pulled out some pictures today that were taken at my fortieth birthday party. It really struck me as I began to look over them how much has changed in the past fifteen years. I would say out of about thirty people who were there, five have passed away, three couples have divorced, and about five others I’ve lost touch with.

As I remembered, I thought of each one. Each and every one of those people, outside of a few spouses that came along, has played a very important role in my life. They are what my life history is all about.

For those who have passed away. My Dad, he was this strong and silent force in my life, and a place where I felt most safe and secure. My Grandma, who passed away a year ago this July. She was sweet and caring and made the best home made biscuits! She gave me the recipe once and when I tried to make them, they just didn’t taste the same. When I told her that, she said “well good”. She didn’t mind passing the recipe down, but it was important that she still be the best at it. I think it was because she used an old canning lid to cut out the biscuits, where I used a regular biscuit cutter.

Then, there was my sister-in-law, Lee. She passed away in 1997. She and I were pretty close. She was the best storyteller. She could always make something funny out of life in general. Her favorite food was salami and macaroni salad. Give her those two things and she was in heaven. I can see her now, taking a bite of macaroni, closing her eyes, moving her head to the left and right in real quick movement, and saying hmmm, hmmm, hmmm. Lucky for her too, it never showed up on her waistline! I miss the long talks we use to have.

Next, there is Barbara. She was a lady my Mom’s age, and was the one who hired me when I went to work for the university that I ended up working for the last 20 years before retiring. Her passing was very unexpected. Although she was my direct supervisor, we became good friends too. During the time we worked together, she placed an ad in the personals on my behalf. She wanted to prove to me that there were men out there that liked full figured women. I did end up with a few “nibbles” but nothing promising ever came from them. We had a good laugh over the whole thing anyway.

The last in the pictures is my sweet friend Teody. She had suffered for many years with kidney disease. She was this little petite Filipino woman. We worked together, but were also friends outside of work. She use to come barging into my office, calling out my name, excited about something she wanted to tell me. She would then kind of shrug her shoulders and giggle when I would “scold” her about being so loud when there was a meeting going on in the boss’s office. She had a kidney transplant that didn’t work, and went back in the hospital to have it removed. The surgery was successful but just days before she was scheduled to come back to work, she passed away peacefully in her sleep. She was only 49.

The couples that have divorced have gone on with new lives. I miss the ones that are no longer around because of the divorce.

The friends I no longer keep in touch with, I wish I did, but our lives took off on different roads at some point. One of them I really would like to know how she is, but my attempts in locating her have been futile. She and I met in the early 70’s. She would come over to my place in the late evening and need coffee so bad that she would use a napkin to strain the coffee as she poured hot water from the tap over it! I later found out that most of those times she was high on some sort of drug, or drunk. She drifted in and out of my life for years, and then finally came back into it for quite a while. She had gotten sober, and was very active in AA for years. When her son died of AIDS, she quit going to AA, and suddenly disappeared again. I know it was a very difficult time for her. I pray that it didn’t send her spiraling down again.

Yes, a lot sure has changed in the past fifteen years. I’m not feeling sad, just grateful for the memories.

Thanks for taking this trip down memory lane with me today.

5 Comments
Terms of Endearment May 7, 2006 9:53 pm
559 Views
Sweetie, Hon, Sweetheart, Sugar Pie, Darl'n .... all terms of endearment. I'm a little reserved in expressing those terms. For me, they are used because I feel affection towards someone, be it a family member, friend, true Sweetheart, or any kid.

They are not words that I use casually. I'm not knocking anyone that does ... it's just how I am.

When someone who is just a casual acquaintance ... or not even an acquaintance at all, uses an endearment on me, I usually think to myself "hey, I'm not your honey, so back off" I really don't care for a woman to call me hon or sweetie either, again, unless it is someone who I have an affinity towards.

Today however, was a different experience all together. I drove up to a little coffee shack and there was this very cute, black hair, dark blue eyed young man about 24 years old sitting on the inner edge of the window sill, reading a book and waiting for the next customer (me) to drive up.

We greeted each other, and he said "what can I get you sweetie?" I'm thinking ... "Sweetie?" I'm old enough to be your Mother! lol

Then I asked him about the book he was reading and we chit chatted about it while he got my coffee drink. He was a really nice guy. He even gave me three punches in my coffee card instead of the usual one!

I paid him for the coffee, left him a tip and said "have a good day." He said back "you have a good day too sweetie."

I drove off saying to myself "you can call me sweetie anytime you want sugarpie"

It definitely was a nice day.

13 Comments
Big Brother May 6, 2006 12:07 pm
510 Views

Today is my big brother’s birthday. We are 18 months apart. His name is Forest Jr. but we call him Fred. I was sitting here thinking about him and decided to honor his birthday by putting some memories down on paper.

He and I have shared a close bond, which has developed and strengthened through the years. Not only are we siblings, but good friends as well.

As young children, we played and fought like most siblings do. Fred loved to scare my younger brother and me. He sometimes would chase after us by doing this little robotic thing, hands fisted up, arms stretched out in front of him and walking stiff legged and straight until he hit an obstacle such as a piece of furniture or the wall. Then he would turn and continue walking, always with this blank stare on his face and a mission to get us so worked up we would end up pleading for him to stop. On one occasion he ended up putting his fist through the living room wall as he used it as a bouncing off point. Needless to say my folks were not too overjoyed.

Fred got his first guitar Christmas of 1959, along with a lesson book. Since then, he has developed into a very fine musician and songwriter. He has played in bands and performed to audiences as a one-man band. However, his exposure has been limited. His desire is to put out a CD some day. He certainly has a sufficient library of his work to do that. I hope he will see that dream come true. He not only plays guitar, but piano, keyboard, banjo and even played the trombone in high school. He has written songs with a western flair, country rock, hard rock, love songs and just plain instrumental. An orchestra could very easily perform some of his music, as he has written pieces that include parts for other musical instruments such as the piano, violin, horns and flutes, etc. Some very beautiful music and as you can already figure, work that I am very proud of.

My brother is a widower. His wife past away in 1997 after a battle with pancreatic cancer. Those were such difficult times for them. I have always admired and looked up to him, but it was through this time of pain and hardship that I really saw the strength and compassion that makes up so much of who he is. The care and love that he gave to his wife during her illness was so selfless. I know there must have been plenty of times of frustration, but he was her rock through it all. After her death he immersed himself even more in his music, and most of his songs were written since then. Now, he has a good relationship with a woman who has shared his life for many years. He told me once, after he and Gloria got together, that his love for her did not diminish at all the love he had for his wife, and the fact that he had the capacity to love again after losing her was a gift from God.

The most difficult part of moving this last year was the knowledge that I wouldn’t be seeing him as often. We talk on the phone, and send emails back and forth, but I miss the hugs … I miss visiting and talking over a cup of coffee about spiritual things, and every day life stuff. He and I do not exactly agree on some issues, but I guess we have come to agree to disagree. I miss sitting and listening to him play his guitar and being able to sing along.

I wrote the following poem about him back in 1985

“Freddie”

Twinkle in his eye,
Tune put to music with his fingers
Magic is performed to warm the hearts
Of the listening ear.
Laughter in his voice, as he shares his feelings
Thru the harmony of his guitar.
Warm, gentle, young at heart
Serious, caring, mature … who is he?
Someone I adore and look to
For approval, and know I have it.
He has supported me, loved me
And shared with me his music
Memories I hold dear
Who is he?
He’s my brother Freddie.

How fortunate I am to call him brother.
3 Comments
Mother's Day is approaching, and I'm no Mother May 5, 2006 3:26 pm
524 Views
When I was in my teens I would, as most young teenage girls, dream of the Knight in Shining Armor that would whisk me away into a “happy ever after” life. I wasn’t planning on some high-class career, I was going to get married and have babies, and I wanted ten. Don’t ask me why I didn’t just make it an even dozen, but ten was my count, five of each. I loved the idea of having a large family.

I graduated from high school and took one year of a two-year secretarial course at a community college. I was paying for it myself, and ended up not able to pay for the second year. To be honest, I didn’t have the drive to even make the effort. It is unfortunate, but back then it really wasn’t emphasized as much for a woman to go on to higher education, at least not in my little world. At the age of twenty, I moved to the big city with dreams of finding a good job to keep me busy until my Knight showed up.

For the first five years I was having fun and wasn’t keeping watch for my Knight. My house mates and I really took advantage of our independence. Both friends married the same summer, and I moved into an apartment to live by myself for the first time. Through the next ten years I had three more house mates, each one getting married and moving on, and I back to living by myself. After the last one, I just figured it was better to live by myself and not deal with all these weddings taking place, and none of them being mine.

I have remained close with three of those friends and have been around to celebrate the births of all their kids, watch them grow, and see them become responsible adults with children of their own. My friends are now Grandmother’s and I’m still no Mother.

I think I was around the age of forty when I went through a period of mourning. I realized that my chances of having one child, let alone ten, was becoming less and less. It was hard at times and I would cry out to God and ask why? I would have been a good Mom. I would have loved them, nurtured them, protected them, and done the best I could to raise them right. It just didn’t seem fair, when so many kids were being raised in sad and abusive situations.

Single parent adoptions were also few and far between at that time and I never considered it an option. Since then, a cousin of mine, who is about ten years younger than I, adopted a little baby girl. She is happy, and Katie is a sweet little girl, but again, it hasn’t been easy for her.

I got over my mourning period, and settled in to the reality of being childless. I did what I could to fill the empty space by spending as much time with my niece and nephew, being a Big Sister, and helping a friend out once in a while by taking her kids for the day and we’d go play. I even had a small collection of toys and games to entertain them when they came to visit.

Mother’s Day is a time for acknowledging the wonderful Mother’s out there. I have one, and I am so blessed. However, it is also a day that points out to me that I’m no Mother.

I’m okay with it now. For whatever purpose God has for me and the life I’m living, children was not part of that. Sometimes I say, “Lord, when I see you face to face, I’ve got a lot of questions for you, so get ready.” Then I think, when I am face to face with Him, nothing else will matter. So, why not take on that attitude now. In the end, my happiness comes from the Lord.

I’m thinking I’d make a good Grandma, ... and there is still time to find a Grandpa.

I’ve not lost hope.

God Bless you Mother's everywhere.

~Karen
6 Comments
1 2 3 4 5 ... 10 ... 20 ... 30 ... 40 ... 50 ... 60 ... 67 68 69 70 71 ... 73 74 75

To link to this blog (Ola2006) use [blog Ola2006] in your messages.
58 F
Guidelines
November 2008
Sun Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat
            1
1
2
  		3
  		4
  		5
1
6
  		7
1
8
1
9
  		10
1
11
  		12
1
13
1
14
3
15
1
16
  		17
  		18
  		19
  		20
1
21
  		22
 
23
  		24
  		25
  		26
  		27
  		28
  		29
 
30
  		           

Recent Visitors
VisitorAgeSexDate
Poetdancer_ 49F11/19
samsam1055058M11/19
stillupforfun 65M11/19
thatbillguy71M11/18
DenverColorado 70M11/18
MzKittie 46F11/17
taxman2903 83M11/17
Morten44M11/16
Carolina_Barbe 67F11/16
MrNiceGuy195454M11/16
Most Recent Comments by Others
PostPosterPost Date
YOU KNOW WHAT I LIKE ABOUT YOU ALL?flakes48Nov 17 8:42 am
ON LINE DATING ERRORS ~ MENbikenskiNov 16 7:46 am
WANT TO COME TO MY PARTY?JustbelleNov 15 9:24 pm
ON LINE DATING ERRORS - WOMENJANO48Nov 15 4:46 am
ANTONIO BANDERAS MOVE OVER!thatbillguyNov 14 9:12 pm
PASSING TIMEJANO48Nov 13 3:00 am
A LITTLE OF THIS AND A LITTLE OF THATthatbillguyNov 12 10:55 pm
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED?IAMWOMAN57Nov 11 6:15 pm
OUR FAMILY COO COO CLOCKthatbillguyNov 10 11:42 am
JUST IN GENERALRosePetals123Nov 8 5:31 pm
THE OLD MAN IS SNORINGMrNiceGuy1954Nov 5 7:53 am